|
|
|
|
Well, they say that no news is good news and therefore if we follow that line of reasoning we have an astounding amount of good news for you.
Which is to say we have no news.
No, not a thing.
Not even a small thing.
Not even a tiny thing that you can look at and say, "goodness me, isn't that tiny" and be amazed at the tininess of it all.
Good news or what?
:)
|
The Holy George Executive can barely find the breath to announce it but, lo, announce it we must!! Hot on the things that you find in shoes when you have your feet in them of our last news announcement of NEW NEWS only last week (give or take a day or two) we bring you MORE NEW NEWS!!!
YES! MORE NEW NEWS!!!
Incredible though it may seem we are happy to announce (well, we say happy, more not unhappy really) another tune. This NEW NEWS is not to be mistaken for the same NEW NEWS that we had last week (previous proviso regarding addition or subtraction of days still applies) but, in fact, absolutely and totally NEW NEWS in its own right!
HURRAH!!
So, once again we say, get along to the musicality page or press the play button languishing at the bottom of this page and be entertained. Or not. Nevertheless, press the play button anyway and we will promise not to make any tenuous jokes such as the one that accompanied our last ALL NEW NEW NEWS!
The tune you're looking for is called PIL.
We're not entirely sure why.
Holy George
:-)
|
The Holy George Executive were on the brink (or even possibly slightly past it and actually holding on by one final, slowly creaking and ripping torturously from the last remaining strips and fragments of cuticle, fingernail), of announcing once again that there was in fact no news and draw a line under everything for the rest of the year when, suddenly, lo, there was news!
Hurrah! Hurrah for news!
And this was not old news, re-hashed and re-packaged in a different colour, possibly tied with ribbon and/or brightly coloured string but, in fact, brand spanking new news!
Hurrah! Hurrah for brand spanking new news!
We know - you are as underwhelmed as we are. We can feel your vibe.
Nevertheless, new news is exactly what it is and, therefore, the Holy George Executive now bring you new news (not old news - we just wanted to clarify that… again) of a new piece of musicality that you can listen to, download or even play with in the bath with the correct water-proofing precautions.
Yes indeed.
So go now to our musicality page or even simply press the musicality button at the bottom of this page and let the sounds assail your ears or, because this sentence has been deliberately written to allow this desperately bad piece of wordplay that is about to happen, happen, batter them. Geddit? Batter them. Batter them? Batter your ears? Batter as in assail. Yes? Oh come on… It's the title of the new song: Batter. Do keep up.
And stop smirking at the back…
Holy George
:-)
|
The Holy George Executive would like to apologise for a recent email communication to its legion of fan with regard to the spelling of the word anchovies. Unfortunately the letter 's' was missed off from the end of the word which might give the impression that the individual responsible for the error is an illiterate cretin. This is, of course, correct – they are. However, we apologise for any trauma that this may have caused our legion of fan and trust that you will continue to have a rich and fulfilling life in spite of this heinous occurrence.
Thank you.
Holy George
:-)
|
Well, it's been quite some time since we posted any kind of news here. This is because there hasn't been any news. Well, actually, there has been plenty of news since we last posted any kind of news here but all the news that has happened has, in fact, been news that hasn't actually had anything whatsoever to do with us and, therefore, as you can read all about all the other news that hasn't anything to do with us in lots of other places, there seemed little point in posting that sort of news here. Because, let's be honest, all the news that you would expect to read here you would expect to be about us. And as that sort of news wouldn't be, well, people might become confused. We might become confused for goodness sakes and then where would we be? In fact, we might already be confused so therefore we have to ask where are we? And if we were, or are confused, and even if we could establish where we were or even are, then we would only become even more confused by further confusion and then where would be then? And why? You can see the problem, I'm sure...
So then...
As we were saying it has been some time since we posted any news (about us, not about anybody else - which, as already stated, we haven't posted either for the aforementioned reason) so we have decided that now would be as good a time as any to post some news. In posting the news we are about to post, we would like to point out that this is not in fact new news but news of quite an old nature - although it has to be also said that this old news has not been posted before and, therefore, is probably actually new news to some extent if you look at it in the right light and squint a bit.
Anyway... new old news...
Recently, we found languishing on one of the Holy George hard drives some footage, possibly yardage, or even metreage depending on your measuring stick inclination, of the old b******s sometimes known as Holy George brandishing their instruments in what used to be the home of one of their groupies and purveyor of fine herbal teas. No, really. Do not stand aghast like that, it could cause you skeletal-muscular problems in later life.
Still...
The Holy George Executive therefore, on the discovery of said footage, yardage, metreage, etc, decided to place it onto the world wide webbery for the entertainment of its legion of fan. There are no new songs to be experienced in this incredible archival release but why not listen to the same old songs again and relive those Holy George moments one more time with feeling. And possibly a biscuit. And a cup of herbal tea. And a Mars Bar. Or something. A piece of cheese perhaps.
You can engage in the beating of the dead horse HERE.
|
The Holy George Executive are proud to announce that it is now one whole year since we posted our first news update and, furthermore, we are also proud to announce that one year on from that historic date we have absolutely no other new news to report!
Well, that's not entirely true, as such. It would be truer to say that we are in fact actually in the process of recording an exciting new ditty entitled THMLFB.
But we're negative bastards and suspect that nobody is interested anyway so, on the off chance that you are interested, just humour us and pretend that we didn't mention that last bit.
Good. That's alright then.
:-)
|
The Holy George Executive would like to make the following announcement. It has been said that no news is good news but, actually, we refute that and, in fact, insist that no news is indeed no news and, therefore, we would like to take this moment to inform you all (you know who you are) that today we have no good news and thus we have absolutely no news whatsoever. We trust that clarifies the matter sufficiently.
:-)
|
 Yes! We have stupendous new news!!! The Holy George Executive are pleased and proud to announce and present:
LADIES IN PANTS!!!
Yes, the Holy George Executive are trembling with unsuppressed and uncontainable excitement as we reveal the news that one of our hottest hot hits has been chosen very specifically from a very competitive and very short, short list to enhance an excitingly exciting new and so incredibly major you wouldn’t believe it even if we told you (which we are so ignore that last bit and believe us!) nationwide advertising campaign for a stylish new product currently hitting the streets of the nation (on account of it being a nationwide advertising campaign sort of thing).
Yes indeed! Is that Stupendous or what?!!
But what of the LADIES IN PANTS you ask?! And we reply: because one of our hottest hot hits which has been chosen very specifically from a very competitive short, short list (just in case we didn’t mention it!) will now be providing musical accompaniment to LADIES IN PANTS!!! (And also a bloke in shorts, vest and trainers but we’re not interested in him!)
To find out more, or, more to the point, to see LADIES IN PANTS, all you have to do is follow the following link that is following the flow at just about any pixel now. And yes, here it is: This way to the LADIES IN PANTS!
The same LADIES IN PANTS can also be found at this location: The same LADIES IN PANTS!
Wait a minute, you say? What IS the product? Oh… right… yes… the product. Well, the product is some spiffingly stylish wrist thingy which enables you to bungy jump and ride camels and jump through hoops of fire or something like that whilst still maintaining a secure grip on your wallet-related stuff wearing only your pants! Thus, you too can become LADIES IN PANTS!!! (Well, unless you’re not a lady of course in which case we’re not that interested). K-Kuff is the name of the game and just clicking here will take you to the home of K-Kuff.
At this point...
The Holy George Executive would like to point out at this stage that any allegations of compromising, prostituting or selling out our art from are heinous and without foundation. In response, we would like to say that the product which we have agreed to promote meets with the high eco standards that the Holy George Executive always seek to promote and adhere to and that if such were not the case then obviously we would not be putting our very sincere endorsement to the product in question, and that we were in no way swayed by LADIES IN PANTS!!!
Oh, hang on, apparently we were…
Hurrah! Hurrah!! Hurrah for LADIES IN PANTS!
(And Holy George, obviously)
|
TIMBER launched in a blaze of no publicity. Nevertheless, two people notice it without provocation. Hurrah! Hurrah for two people noticing without provocation! Hurrah!
|
In the absence of new news, we opted for a new look instead. Although this could of course easily be construed as new news, we didn't want to take the risk of being sued under the "Misleading New News' laws (Act of Parliament, 1824) and so we decided to play it safe and not call it new news. Or any news.
Even if it is.
|
As cited on the 24th February, and for those of you who are vaguely interested, here is the new news. Well, we say new news. It's actually more like new news of old news. Anyway, essentially, we here at Holy George Central (altitude 337ft) have uploaded some of the very same material you may not have yet viewed here for whatever reason, to yet ANOTHER place for viewing. Yes, you can now view the VERY SAME videos that none of you have bothered to view from HERE at You Tube at our brand new unvisited and unwatched You Tube Holy George Channel :-) Actually, when we say the very same videos, although they are the very same videos, they are not entirely the same. So it's probably worth taking a moment or two to view them.
Or not.
I mean, there's no law that says that you have to. We have, obviously. And nobody forced us to. And in much the same way, nobody can force you to. And that's okay. But we won't take it personally. Not us. It's not like we're going to need trauma counselling or anything like that. No, not us. We're secure in our own identities. It’s not as if we have any major personality instabilities. In fact, we have no major character defects at all. And we certainly don’t have any that would be exacerbated or even reinforced in a “we knew it!!” kind of way by the overwhelming feeling that nobody cares. No, not us. No. Not at all. The only reason we ever go to see our psychiatrist is because he has a lovely carpet.
So, that's the news then, we like our psychiatrist's carpet.
:-)
|
To satifisfy an urge that we should inform you of some new news, here is some news that we can reliably inform you about, and that is that, as of today, 24th February 2010, there WILL soon be some new news ... SOON :-)
[Simonitov Zebedee says: Steve is, as we speak/as you read, busy proof-reading this You see, he THINKS that people WILL some day read this. He THINKS that people truly give a damn. He is an optimist. That defies his capricorn character. He is very mistaken, bless. I, on the other hand, am a TRUE capricorn. I KNOW that no one gives a damn.].
[Steve replies: Actually, I sincerely refute Simonitov's inference that I am in any way of a positive and hopeful disposition. Lies, lies and more lies!!!!! I am in fact almost as miserable as he is and have almost as many issues. I demand an apology forthwith.]
[Simonitov Zebedee replies: No f*** off or I'll split the band and go and play guitar for Peters and Lee.]
[Steve replies: Oh yes, that's right, every time - the same tired old Peters and Lee ultimatum. Well, let me tell you this, it doesn't matter what you say in this news section because I'll be the only person to read it. Not the most demonstrative ultimatum the world will ever see, eh? Stick that on your petard!!]
[Simonitov Zebedee replies: OK]
So, remember, fans, new news soon :-)
|
Here at the Holy George Executive, we can report that today, following months of intensive Robbi Studios activity, Holy George have completed their latest opus, Crazy To Stay. And, pop pickers, we know you'll be ... crazy to miss it !!
Oh yes !!
|
|
|
By the way, we forgot to actually tell you about our World Tour Of A Village Near Salisbury.
The village in question was Stapleford, north of Salisbury. The venue, a small village hall, compact but perfectly formed.
Three sets of three songs a piece were played between Will Blake and Greg Stacey, Holy George, Megan Hickin (of BBC Radio Leicester breakfast show fame and accompanied for one song by Janet Hickin), Fay Brotherhood and Kim Sewell, each interspersed by cups of tea, fags, biscuits, discussions of world politics and Big Bruva.
Holy George rehearsed for about four weeks and presented Take It Or Leave It, Horror of Life, Man As Man, Song 3, Dressed In Grey, Walk With Me, Ratified and That's Not Me.
To everyone's dismay, we were unfortunately unable to play the timeless classics, Go And Tell Aunt Nancy nor the Crystal Chandelier.
It must be said that, as suggested, Simon is "proud" of his "intense shredding" ... although he needs to try harder with the feedback tho !!
Steve is particularly proud of his Cardinal Lobelia, although admittedly they are not a patch on what they were last year.
Edit: Sorry, I didn't realise I was meant to say what I saw proud of musically. Hang on... SB
Steve is particularly proud of the fact he kept his bum notes to about 3 instances. If anyone counted more than that, then they just don't understand the HG musical concept, man... :-)
|
Yes, as stated below, the gruelling Holy George World Tour of A Village Near Salisbury is finally over and we write this following a heavy end of tour tea party - there were also crisps.
For all you dedicated followers and fans unable to attend the otherwise unknown, unpublicised and unadvertised event, we know that you will be mightily relieved to discover that this historical event was recorded for posterity in glorious and various shades of light and dark so that you too could enjoy the Holy George experience.
So, boil the kettle, reach for the rich tea, kick off your slippers and navigate to our all-new Media Videos page for seconds worth of quality listening pleasure. Tell your friends. Invite your family. Write to your MP and spread the word.
The word is Holy George (two words, yes but spread them anyway) !
|
HG's World Tour of a Village Near Salisbury ends today!
|
HG's World Tour of a Village Near Salisbury starts today!
|
For the many 1000s of you who are feverishly clamouring for a news update, HG Central can report that creativity at Robbi Studios is somewhat lacking at the moment due to the fact that Holy George are deeply ensconced in the hi-fidelity comfort suite of Robbi Studios amidst a heavy rehearsal schedule for their up-coming World Tour of A Village Near Salisbury, England.
Such is their dedication that they have spurned all bacon sandwiches for the time being. Furthermore, they have only been to the sweet shop once in the past three weeks !!
...
...
... no-one reads this you know ... only Steve and Simon ... we could write anything ... but we don't care ... still, keeps a web-server company in business ... hooray for HG and their philanthropic web-server company patronage !! It's not like we're doing it for any of our benefit is it !!
Please come and visit our web site :-) Cheese, nice pictures of pantaloons and some quality vibes to boot. Please.
|
Holy George in shock-horror fingernail catastrophe!!
|
Uploaded new mix of the old Holy George classic "Ratified" :-)
|
New and informative bio's !!
|
Uploaded the new Holy George top 10 best-selling hit, "That's Not Me" ... well we are an optimistic pair :-)
|
Uploaded new mix of Take It Or Leave It for your delectation and listening pleasure.
|
Breaking news ... no new news yet !!
|
Holy George have decided to open the front door. They are still keeping well away from the hit counter though!
|
Holy George decide not to reinstate their hit counter. So, still no-one visits then?!
|
Holy George now have www.holygeorge.co.uk !!
|
No-one visits. Holy George have removed their hit counter!
|
Holy George have got a website with a hit counter!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
