I would be the first to admit that there is much about the world, about life, that I do not understand. I would probably also be the second one to admit to it too. And the third. And the fourth. In fact, such is the interest amongst the humanoid life forms on this planet in anything that I would admit to, I could probably get the first several hundred thousand admissions in before someone else raised their hand to mention it.
I don’t understand the complex; I don’t always understand the trivial. A lot of the time I don’t understand me. Not once I get past the socks anyway.
What else? Ah, yes…
Car engines. I don’t understand those in a very comprehensive way. Show me anything about a car engine, explain it to me in either painstaking detail or childlike simplicity, I won’t get it. I won’t understand it. Did you feel that jet of air on your eyebrows? That’s the wake of my understanding not only going over my head but your head too.
The binary system. I don’t understand that. To my mind there really ought not to be a lot there to not understand but, nevertheless, I don’t understand it.
Chord theory. I don’t understand that at all. Simonitov probably explained it all to me once but once again the rippling of air through your eyebrows will indicate that the facts, the explanations, totally failed to stick in my slowly wizening yet un-wise brain.
The Dewey System. I think I may have understood that once, but if I did, I don’t now.
Oh, oh! I’ve got another one! Yes! The new car registration plates!! I totally have no idea what they are all about. I mean, what was wrong with the old system? Baffled, that’s me.
Baffled.
Baffled and baffling
And baffling, the B word, gets me onto the P word. Politics.
Because politics totally baffles me. I expect it probably baffles a lot of people. But I expect, that on some level, a lot of people do understand it beyond and/or through the bafflement.
I don’t.
I was watching a news broadcast this evening. The Prime Minister lost the election. And yet there he is, still being the Prime Minister. Still scrabbling to stay in power – apparently for the good of the country. I thought about that for a while and then had to concede that, “Nope, I’m still not understanding it”.
Then there was the bit of the political news that went on about how the ‘team’ that totally lost the election now has the power to decide who ‘wins’ it. No matter how hard I think about that, I just cannot make understanding descend upon me and illuminate my brain cells to the point where they go “BING!” and enlightenment engulfs me.
I really just don’t understand.
I’m not taking a political stance here; politics is too emotive, too devisive, just too much everything to go around doing that. Even Simonitov and I don’t agree on politics other than that politicians are a necessary evil (citation required!) and are generally a bunch of self-serving power seekers even at the local level where they spend most of their time having pictures taken of themselves pointing at things for the glossy brochures that they do so love to give out. So anyway, politics, Simonitov and I, we don’t go there. We talk about women instead. Broadly speaking. Snigger.
:)
And, of course, women are another avenue of not understanding that I can lay claim to. Of course, I feel fairly certain that I am not alone in this. And of course, it works both ways; I’m equally certain that women don’t really understand men – other than what it takes to get them to go shopping and attempt a bit of DIY.
It’s the whole book malarkey about Venus and Mars.
And talking of Mars, I see there was a new dark chocolate version out recently of that particular classic confectionary. I didn’t understand that either. I mean, why? Why a dark chocolate Mars Bar? What’s wrong with the tried and tested milk chocolate variety?
It’s beyond me – as most things are.
Another thing I don’t understand – why, as happened the other day also, can I not remember the catchy little tune I was bashing out about an hour ago? Why has it slipped from my memory when it was patently such a groovy little tune?
Ah, such is life I suppose.
Curiously enough, I have just written a song (for a flexible value of given – i.e. I wrote it a couple of months ago now and have just gotten back to faffing with it again) called Too Much Information in which I make the spurious claim that “I understand it all”. Considering that everything I have just written here contradicts that claim, it would seem that said claim may not be entirely accurate.
Hmm… hoisted on my own petard. And by my own hand too.
I guess that you won’t be
surprised to discover that I really don’t understand that either.
Ho
hum, said Pooh.
Steve B
:-)
I don’t understand the complex; I don’t always understand the trivial. A lot of the time I don’t understand me. Not once I get past the socks anyway.
What else? Ah, yes…
Car engines. I don’t understand those in a very comprehensive way. Show me anything about a car engine, explain it to me in either painstaking detail or childlike simplicity, I won’t get it. I won’t understand it. Did you feel that jet of air on your eyebrows? That’s the wake of my understanding not only going over my head but your head too.
The binary system. I don’t understand that. To my mind there really ought not to be a lot there to not understand but, nevertheless, I don’t understand it.
Chord theory. I don’t understand that at all. Simonitov probably explained it all to me once but once again the rippling of air through your eyebrows will indicate that the facts, the explanations, totally failed to stick in my slowly wizening yet un-wise brain.
The Dewey System. I think I may have understood that once, but if I did, I don’t now.
Oh, oh! I’ve got another one! Yes! The new car registration plates!! I totally have no idea what they are all about. I mean, what was wrong with the old system? Baffled, that’s me.
Baffled.
Baffled and baffling
And baffling, the B word, gets me onto the P word. Politics.
Because politics totally baffles me. I expect it probably baffles a lot of people. But I expect, that on some level, a lot of people do understand it beyond and/or through the bafflement.
I don’t.
I was watching a news broadcast this evening. The Prime Minister lost the election. And yet there he is, still being the Prime Minister. Still scrabbling to stay in power – apparently for the good of the country. I thought about that for a while and then had to concede that, “Nope, I’m still not understanding it”.
Then there was the bit of the political news that went on about how the ‘team’ that totally lost the election now has the power to decide who ‘wins’ it. No matter how hard I think about that, I just cannot make understanding descend upon me and illuminate my brain cells to the point where they go “BING!” and enlightenment engulfs me.
I really just don’t understand.
I’m not taking a political stance here; politics is too emotive, too devisive, just too much everything to go around doing that. Even Simonitov and I don’t agree on politics other than that politicians are a necessary evil (citation required!) and are generally a bunch of self-serving power seekers even at the local level where they spend most of their time having pictures taken of themselves pointing at things for the glossy brochures that they do so love to give out. So anyway, politics, Simonitov and I, we don’t go there. We talk about women instead. Broadly speaking. Snigger.
:)
And, of course, women are another avenue of not understanding that I can lay claim to. Of course, I feel fairly certain that I am not alone in this. And of course, it works both ways; I’m equally certain that women don’t really understand men – other than what it takes to get them to go shopping and attempt a bit of DIY.
It’s the whole book malarkey about Venus and Mars.
And talking of Mars, I see there was a new dark chocolate version out recently of that particular classic confectionary. I didn’t understand that either. I mean, why? Why a dark chocolate Mars Bar? What’s wrong with the tried and tested milk chocolate variety?
It’s beyond me – as most things are.
Another thing I don’t understand – why, as happened the other day also, can I not remember the catchy little tune I was bashing out about an hour ago? Why has it slipped from my memory when it was patently such a groovy little tune?
Ah, such is life I suppose.
Curiously enough, I have just written a song (for a flexible value of given – i.e. I wrote it a couple of months ago now and have just gotten back to faffing with it again) called Too Much Information in which I make the spurious claim that “I understand it all”. Considering that everything I have just written here contradicts that claim, it would seem that said claim may not be entirely accurate.
Hmm… hoisted on my own petard. And by my own hand too.
I guess that you won’t be
surprised to discover that I really don’t understand that either.
Ho
hum, said Pooh.
Steve B
:-)